I Can't Write Poetry

Strange things happen. About eighteen

months ago, quite out of the blue I felt the

urge to write a poem. I was driving at the

time and I was thinking about the walk to

shore from my grandfather' s house that

was a familiar part of my summer holidays

as a child. I was on my way to Lancaster

University. When I arrived I went for a

coffee, pulled out my note book and started

writing. The words just came, why I am not

sure. Hitherto I had considered myself

incapable of writing a poem. I enjoy poetry

and I admire those who can write it, but

never me.

So why did I start writing poetry? I am not

sure, it may be an age thing. But they keep

on coming, often in the most unlikely

places, what I call my "bog seat moments, 

because that is where and when I seem to

 find inspiration. I don't think Wordsworth 

has much to worry about but eighteen 

months on I find myself with a collection 

of poems. So here is my first book of poems 

and the nostalgic thoughts that are often 

associated with them. 

My first book created in Blurb for my own
amusement and as a gift for friends and
family I called Remembering, because as I
said earlier the first poem I wrote was about
remembering the place I spent so many of
my childhood holidays and many oth the
other poems are also inspired by nostalgic
memories.

For a limited time you can download the
PDF version of the book here.
The file will open on most computers but
if you have a problem download a copy
of Adobe Reader to view it.

PS I am about to publish my second book of poems!

Dissertation - Abstract and Synopsis

Self: The Photograph, Memory and Nostalgia

Abstract 

This enquiry takes the form of a personal reflective narrative within a theoretical framework influenced by the writings of Barthes, Sontag, Benjamin and others. It opens by briefly exploring the historical development of photography and the emergence of the photograph as a as the snapshot in the context of the family photograph. The enquiry considers the relationship between the family photograph and the development of autobiographical memory in turn a detailed exploration of the influence of autobiographical memory and the sense of self. Finally the dissertation explores the emotional influence of nostalgia as a catalyst in the development of a sense of self and place.

This dissertation is part of a larger body of work including a practice based exhibition comprising three installations which explore in turn; the notion of aging and mortality through the decay of memory and the ephemeral photograph; the family photograph and the uncanny nature of the pose based on a selection of family photographs spanning four generations; a simulation of the frailty of memory in which appropriated frames of decaying film stock are combined with familiar images in a dissonant melange of the familiar and the confused.

The enquiry is informed by a series of questions: Is my art practice born out of a sense of self and agency? What are the influence of autobiographical memory and the emotion of nostalgia?

Synopsis

The objective of this dissertation is to explore the influences which have informed my art practice and which give rise to my recurring themes of decay, memory and nostalgia through the medium of photography, in its broadest terms.

My contention is that my practice is born out of a sense of self and agency moulded by the influence of autobiographical memory and the remembered self. I will argue that I am influenced by the cultural background and geography of my childhood the embodiment of which is the family photograph.
My enquiry is composed of two elements, the dissertation and a practice based exhibition. The dissertation will take the form of a personal reflective narrative. The practice component is based on the experimental aspect of my current practice with an emphasis on themes drawn specifically from the substance of my enquiry.

I shall open by exploring a brief history of photography and the emergence of the photograph as a medium and as an intrinsic part of family life whilst considering the influence of the photograph in the development of autobiographical memory in association with the family photograph and the family photograph album. This in turn will lead me to a more detailed exploration of the nature of autobiographical memory and the influence of memory on the development of the sense of self. Thirdly I shall explore the emotional influence of nostalgia as a catalyst in the context of self and place. Finally, I shall introduce the practice and contextual aspect of the dissertation.

Fragments of Memory

It is the end of the penultimate semester and we have the first half of our Final Assessment so I have been burning the midnight oil finishing off my various projects and getting my sketchbook up-to-date.

Through both my dissertation and fine art practice work continues to explore the aesthetic aspects of decay, memory/remembering, nostalgia and melancholia. I am interested in exploring the ugly as compared to the beautiful using decay as the metaphor. I am endeavouring to explain my enquiry through the visualisation of the concept of perception and how this relates to memory and the emotions of nostalgia and melancholia.

I am considering the manner in which the eye converts visual information into memory, how the brain perceives this information and how this information is subsequently retrieved to form part of our emotional and aesthetic experience. My enquiry considers the modern science of neuro-physiology, neuro-aesthetics in the response to art and the aesthetic experience. The work employs a combination of video and still images arranged in multiple layers to create visual complexity challenging the perception of the viewer to recognise the familiar within the unfamiliar.

The following video is one of the 3 video works I have on display. The other 2 have to be viewed in-situ as they employ partly silvered mirror as the front element of the work, this makes videoing the work difficult.



Fragments of Memory

This video makes use of appropriated stills from Bill Morrison's film "Light is calling" and part of Michael Gordon's sound track. Morrison's film is based on "found footage" of decaying film. I have reworked the film incorporating into it my own images, mainly nostalgic family photographs. The video explores the notion of fragmented memory and the often confused narration associated with the effects of Alzheimers disease.

This work is for academic purposes only and recognises the original authors copyright no breach of which is intended.